Epilogue: Devils and Angels
by Sweet Lu
Summary: The aftermath of their last operation leaves the team trying to convince Deeks not to resign.


**Epilogue: Devils and Angels**

Hetty stood waiting with the base commander as the chopper landed that was bringing Marty Deeks in from the desert. She knew how much NCIS and the country owed him for what he had done. He had, with the help of ordinary men, kept American missiles out of the hands of terrorists. And she would have no team, if he hadn't made an extraordinary effort to save Kensi, Sam and Callen. How he had found the strength, after what he had endured, she did not know. But that effort had taken a toll on him, not only physically, but mentally as well. She had spoken to Callen, and he had told her what had been said between Sam and Deeks. She knew it was her job now to try and repair her fractured team, but she knew it would not be easy.

Deeks was pushed past her on the gurney taking him into surgery. He was unconscious and she saw the evidence of his ordeal on his face, which was blistered and raw from the sun. His head was wrapped in a bloody bandage and his leg wound seeped blood.

She joined the commander as he spoke with the medic who had been with Deeks on the incoming chopper. "He was awake when we got in the air, sir, but half way through the flight, his blood pressure started dropping, and his temperature went up to 105 degrees," the young medic informed them, "He lost consciousness and became delirious as his temp climbed. I had him on an IV but he really needed to be cooled down, so we got him here as fast as we could. I hope he's going be alright, sir." The commander thanked him and turned towards her. "I hope your man has a little more fight in him, Hetty," the commander said as he headed back to his office, leaving her standing alone in a sterile hallway.

She was there when the second chopper arrived carrying the rest of the team. All of them had to be exhausted, but she needed to debrief them before she let them rest. She had to know everything if she was to put this team back together, something Callen thought might not be possible.

They straggled through the doors, their faces showing the depth of their fatigue. Kensi had darkening bruises around her neck, Callen just looked angry, but it was Sam who looked the worst. She hadn't seen him this dejected since Moe went missing.

"How's Deeks," Kensi was the first to ask, but they all crowded around her for the answer. She told them what the medic had said and she saw the worry on their faces. Sam threw his pack angrily in the corner and slumped to the floor against the wall.

"Mr. Callen, we need to talk," Hetty said leading him into an adjoining room.

Hetty needed to assess each team member's state of mind in order to decide how to proceed. Each one had suffered a loss of confidence. Each one knew they had made mistakes in judgment that had almost cost them their lives and had caused one of their own to be subjected to a brutal test of endurance that was still ongoing. And now they were suffering from guilt over what their decisions had done to Deeks.

"How are you doing, Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked quietly. She knew how hard he could be on himself, and she knew this failure had shaken him. He didn't like making mistakes, especially the kind that had almost cost him the few people he really cared about.

"I feel like shit, Hetty, that's how I feel," his blue eyes flashing with the anger that hadn't left him since Stark pulled a gun on him in the mess hall. "I lost control out there. I didn't pay attention to what was going on with Sam and Stark. He had some kind of hold over Sam and I didn't call Sam on it. I just let it slide, Hetty." He sat down, and she could see the confusion on his face as he assessed his failures. She could tell that he was in as much need as the rest of them.

"Why didn't we listen to Deeks, Hetty?" he said with a puzzled look on his face. "What he said made perfect sense, but we blew him off. I blew him off, so this is really all my fault. Why did I do that?"

"You have been partners with Sam a long time, Mr. Callen," she told him as she sat down next to him. "You let him have his way, instead of looking at the bigger picture and exploring Deeks' concerns. Maybe you've been partners too long." The last comment was spoken softly with a questioning lilt at the end.

"When you first brought Deeks on as the LAPD liaison, I couldn't figure out what you saw in him, none of us could." Callen began to remember. "He seemed like a lightweight. He joked around too much, and he bugged the hell out of Sam. None of us thought he would ever cut it as an agent. But what he did out there today was impressive, Hetty. Those people put themselves at risk for him, and they followed him. That's what a leader does."

"Maybe Mr. Deeks has changed since he has been working with all of you, Mr. Callen", Hetty said, "You may have been too close to see that change, but it was evident on this operation. He took charge because he had to, and he never wavered in his determination to rescue all of you. He was part of a team, Mr. Callen, your team, and he acted on that."

Callen took a deep breath and asked, "Do you think he'll resign?"

"After what you told me he said to Sam, I think he's considering it." Hetty said sadly

"Hetty, none of us want him to resign, but what can we possibly say that will change his mind?" Callen was becoming quite upset at the thought of losing Deeks. "We let him down out there Hetty, we know it and Deeks knows it. He was an hour away from dying a brutal death all alone, and he won't forget that. Yet, he came back for us, and we can never forget that."

"Mr. Callen, if you all let him go, if you don't fight to regain his trust, it will destroy this team, and quite possibly destroy Deeks in the process." Hetty told him vehemently. "He is alone, and he has no family to give him support. This team is his family, Mr. Callen, just like it's yours, so you had better start acting like one and stand by him now, like he stood by you out there in the desert."

...

Hetty was worried most about Sam. When he came into the room she could see the guilt on his face. He was taking on all of the blame for what had happened, and it was crushing him.

"How did Deeks seem to you when you spoke to him after the firefight, Mr. Hannah?" Hetty wanted his opinion and she knew he was the key to keeping Deeks on the team.

Sam was surprised by the question. He had expected to be bawled out by Hetty for all the mistakes in judgment he had made on this operation, but he wasn't prepared to deal with his guilt over what happened to Deeks just yet. If he let himself think about the things Deeks told him as he sat in that chopper, he knew it might overwhelm him. Stark was responsible, but Sam knew he had given Stark the opening he needed to carry out his plan. For the first time he wondered if Stark did know he was on the NCIS team assigned to that missile convoy. Sam owed his life to Stark and that put him under his control and Stark had used that against them all.

He was curious to find out how Stark had gotten his information about that convoy. It was a top-secret operation, and someone in the military had to have given him the intel. And that meant he probably knew Sam was on the NCIS detail, and he felt a dark anger pulse through his body, because he knew he had been an integral part of Stark's plan. But Deeks had questioned, when Sam had not, and that was the guilt he would carry for a long time. If it weren't for Deeks, they would all be dead. Now he owed Deeks his life, and he would never forget it.

"I asked him to tell me what he went through out in the desert," Sam told her softly, staring at the floor. "He didn't want to, Hetty, but I made him. After he told me, he said none of it was my fault, but then he asked me why I didn't trust him, why none of us trusted him. I couldn't answer him because I didn't know, and I still don't. We hurt him, Hetty. I hurt him, and I don't know how to fix that."

"Well, we need to find a way, Sam," she said quietly, "You and Mr. Deeks need to repair your friendship, or we'll never see him again."

Hetty left him sitting solemnly alone, trying to figure out what he could do or say that would make Deeks trust him again.

...

Kensi really didn't want to talk to Hetty, not now anyway. She just wanted to know how Deeks was doing. She wanted to see him and touch him and tell him how sorry she was that she didn't take his side instead of Sam's when he questioned Stark's presence at the airstrip. But, you didn't say no to Hetty, so she found herself in a small sitting room waiting for her. At least there was a vending machine that was full of the kind of junk food she craved. As she stood in front of it trying to decide what she wanted most, she realized how long it had been since she had eaten, and then realized she had no money.

"Need some comfort food, Ms. Blye?" she heard Hetty say behind her. She turned to see Hetty offering her some change, which she gladly took. After getting her Ding-Dong, she settled into the chair across from Hetty and tried to prepare herself for the hard questions to come.

"How badly did he hurt you, Kensi?" Hetty asked quietly. "Callen told me some of it, but he said they knocked he and Sam out, so he doesn't know what happened after that."

Angry tears filled Kensi's eyes as she recalled the terror she felt as Stark choked her and touched her with his filthy hands, all the while taunting her about Deeks. As the memories filled her mind, she thought she was going to be physically sick and went quickly to the sink for a glass of water as she tried to regain her composure.

"I didn't want him to know how scared I was," she said with her back to Hetty, "But, when he kept choking me, and putting his hands all over me I couldn't help myself, Hetty, I pleaded with the bastard...I cried and begged him to stop...but he wouldn't." She felt hot tears streaking down her face and she began to shake and her breath came in short gasps, and then she vomited the Ding-Dong into the sink.

Hetty led her back to the chair and let her get her breathing under control, before asking her the hardest question. "Did he rape you?"

"When he told me Deeks was dying in the desert, and not dead already, I started fighting harder and kicking him and he choked me out. If he hadn't slipped up and let me believe Deeks might still alive, I think he would have. But no, Hetty, he didn't."

Hetty closed her eyes briefly and took Kensi's hand, "Let's go see if your partner is out of surgery"

...

Deeks was in recovery when Hetty and Kensi joined Callen and Sam as they spoke with the surgeon.

"First of all, Mr. Deeks is going to be alright. The bullet cracked his femur, but luckily it missed the main artery, although he did have significant blood loss. His head wounds are quite severe however, and combined with the heat stroke he suffered, he'll be a bit disoriented and dizzy for a while. His blood pressure is still slightly low from the dehydration, but we've got him on fluids, so that will come around. You can see him if you like." Then the surgeon left them. No one spoke, but the sense of relief was evident and small smiles began to appear on their tired faces.

"I've arranged accommodations for everyone for a few days, until we sort out what happened out there, and until I have a chance to speak with Mr. Deeks." Hetty wanted everything resolved before letting them resume their normal lives, if anything would be normal if they let Deeks resign.

"But now, let's go see how he's doing, and let him know we're here." Hetty said leading the way to the recovery room. She knew they would all feel a little better if they saw he was OK. But she also wanted them to see how vulnerable he was and realize that now he needed them.

He was still asleep when they crowded around his bed, looking at the evidence of Stark's violence. His head was heavily bandaged and he looked utterly exhausted. As they talked quietly, he opened his eyes. He looked at each person solemnly, with no hint of recognition, until his gaze stopped on Hetty.

"Hi Hetty," his voice barely above a whisper. They all turned to look at him, but he only acknowledged her. She moved next to the bed and took his hand.

"How are you feeling, Mr. Deeks?" she asked him with a small sympathetic smile.

"Can I talk to you alone?" He asked in response and then closed his eyes.

Hetty nodded silently and the rest of the team walked slowly out, with Kensi lingering, a sad, hurt look in her eyes, before finally following Sam and Callen out.

"Mr. Deeks?" she said, "What can I do for you?"

"I can't be your liaison officer anymore, Hetty," he said softly, "I have to go back to being just an undercover cop. I know what I'm doing when I'm a cop and I only have to trust in myself."

"So, you want to resign." she said shakily.

"Yes." he said, but there were tears brimming in his eyes when he said it. "I'm not one of the team anymore, Hetty, maybe I never really was. They're a good team without me; they trust each other and look out for each other. I'm just the odd man out. They don't take me seriously, and maybe that's my fault, but if they don't trust my instincts, then I'm not doing you, or them, any favors by staying."

"You've been through a lot in the last two days, Mr. Deeks," she persisted, "Why don't you take some time and recover and then we can discuss your request."

"No, Hetty," he said, "just let me go."

"You know I don't give up easily, Mr. Deeks," Hetty said stubbornly. "I usually get what I want."

"Not this time, Hetty." and he closed his eyes and turned away.

...

Hetty found the others having dinner. They all looked so tired she wasn't sure she wanted to tell them what Deeks had just told her. She got herself some tea and joined them.

"We need to know what he said, Hetty," Callen said, "so don't think about saving it for morning."

"He's resigning." she said bluntly, "He wants to be a cop again. He doesn't believe you ever considered him one of the team, and he said if you don't trust his instincts, then he isn't doing the team any favors by staying. He called himself the odd man out and thinks you'll be fine without him."

"Bullshit!" Sam thundered and rose from the table and started towards the recovery unit. Callen stopped him and made him sit down.

"Give him time, Sam, he's still in shock and hurting and he's totally exhausted," Kensi said, her voice rising and breaking as she tried to convince herself that they could change his mind.

"Any ideas, Hetty," Callen knew her well, and she wouldn't give up on Deeks without a fight and without a plan.

"I'm working on it," Hetty rose from the table and surveyed her team, "But right now I want you all to get some rest. Mr. Deeks isn't going anywhere and you've all been through a lot today, so go to bed and we'll work out a strategy tomorrow."

...

As tired as he was, Deeks couldn't sleep. He kept going over everything; how relieved he was when he saw Sam and Callen being pulled out of the humvee, how Kensi looked as Stark whispered in her ear, the firefight, the death of Kennedy, and the satisfaction he felt when he placed the muzzle of the Glock behind Stark's knee and fired. His mind would briefly flash on his time in the desert, but then a feeling of panic would rise in his throat and he would push the memories away and wait until his heart began to beat normally. Sweat broke out on his body whenever he thought about his agonizing ordeal and he knew he never wanted to be anywhere near a desert again in his lifetime.

He began to think about the team and what he told Hetty tonight. It really made sense to resign, but sadness filled him as he thought about all the things he would miss about working with them. Not seeing Kensi every day topped the list, but that feeling of belonging to a tight knit group, almost a family, was what he would miss more than he cared to think about. But, he had been alone a long time before he went to work at NCIS, and he knew he would get used to being on his own again. If he was being honest with himself, though, he would miss that feeling of security when someone was there as a backup if things went sideways on an operation. Yeah, he would miss knowing someone had his back in a firefight, but resigning made sense, didn't it? Dammit, I need to go to sleep.

Then he heard someone enter his room and he wondered which member of the team had come to try and talk him out of leaving.

"Kensi, is that you?" he called into the dark.

Suddenly a hand slammed down over his mouth and a man harshly whispered in his ear, "Don't make a sound or push the call button or I'll beat the crap out of you." Adrenaline surged through his body and he began to struggle, trying to get the man off of him. He felt his punch land solidly on the guy's face, but then pain shot through his body as the man brought his fist down on his wounded leg, and he felt all his energy drain away as the man began pounding him in the stomach and ribs. Finally exhausted he stopped fighting and lay still.

The man moved his hand to Deeks' throat and he got that familiar feeling of having his air cut off.

"Who are you?" He managed to croak as he tried to breathe, "what do you want?

"I want you and your team to pay for what you did to my brother, Mike Stark," the man rasped into his ear as he increased the pressure on Deeks' throat, "And you're gonna help me do it."

"No!" Deeks tried to shout, but the man hit him hard in the face and his mind fogged. He felt another person grab him, and the two men yanked him out of bed and threw him onto a gurney. His head started flashing in pain and dizziness totally disoriented him as he tried to fight back. Then he felt himself slipping into unconsciousness as one of the men injected him with a sedative.

The brother of the man who had almost killed him, searched through Deeks effects until he found his cell phone and then the two men, dressed in orderlies' clothes, wheeled him out of his room.

...

Callen didn't sleep much and tonight was no exception. His mind was analyzing every possible argument that would convince Deeks to stay with the team. Then his phone rang and he was surprised to see Deeks name on the caller ID.

"Hey Deeks, what's up? He said hopefully.

"I've got Deeks and if you want him back you're gonna have to come get him, or his time in the desert is gonna seem like child's play." an ugly voice said harshly into his ear.

Callen was instantly on his feet, and his heart was racing. How the hell did someone get to Deeks on a military base?

"Who are you," Callen asked.

"You'll find that out soon enough," he laughed, "You'll find the coordinates to his location on his hospital bed. But, you better hurry; he doesn't look so good right now. And, if you bring anybody but your other two buddies, I'll slit his throat." Then the line went dead and Callen's mind began to reel. What the hell was going on? He quickly called Sam and Kensi and debated whether to tell Hetty, but realized instantly that they would need a fully coordinated effort if they were to find Deeks and bring him back alive.

Sam was in his room within two minutes, prepped and ready for battle and Kensi was right behind him. Hetty called him and told them to meet her in Deeks' room. She was already there. The three agents looked at each other and the raw anger on their faces would have made Deeks' kidnappers reconsider their plan, because these agents were out for their blood.

Deeks' bed was a mess and blood dotted the sheets and they knew he didn't go easily. The note was on his pillow and Hetty had already been on the phone to Eric, who was racing to the OSP Center with Nell.

"Who could have done this?" Kensi asked as she slumped against the wall. Everyone was on edge and Sam was berating an officer in the corner about the lack of security, when Eric came on the line to Callen, he put him on speaker.

"Callen, I fed the coordinates into the computer and you're not going to be happy about the location." Eric said very quietly, not his usual sharp edged voice. "Deeks is being held on the Northeast edge of Anza Borrego State Park. It's in the middle of the desert, Callen."

Everyone became silent as they realized the impact this must be having on Deeks. Callen thought Sam was going to punch the officer in charge of security and Kensi had a wild look in her eyes that scared him. Everyone was close to being out of control, except Hetty. She immediately called the base commander and had an operations room made available with access to satellite surveillance and any other tech support they would need. Then she sent someone for Kevlar vests for Callen, Sam and Kensi, as well as additional weapons.

"Eric, get me a satellite view of that area, now!" she was fighting the best way she knew how; with every resource she could command. The country owed Mr. Deeks, and she was going to use every tool the military and intelligence community had at its disposal to find him and the men who took him.

"Hetty, I have some additional intel for you," Nell broke in to say, "I was researching Mike Stark, trying to find out his source of information on the missile convoy and I think I found it. He has a half brother, we didn't know about, named Zack Abbott and you're not going to believe this, but he works at Camp Pendleton as a systems analyst."

"Nell send me a photo, this has got to be the guy who took Deeks," Callen and the team looked at each other and determination settled on their faces. "That's how he got Deeks off the base, he has clearance."

"Clearance won't help him when I get my hands on him," Sam said as they headed to the ops room to check out the satellite imagery.

...

Deeks woke as the sun broke over the mountains. He felt the sun's warmth on his face and when he opened his eyes he felt fear begin to flood his mind as he saw where he was. He was alone again in the desert. He was on his knees and tied tightly to a stake in the ground. The panic he felt was almost overwhelming. He tried to free himself, but the thin rawhide they used to tie his hands only became tighter as he struggled. Sweat broke out on his bare chest and his head was spinning. He tried to calm himself, but he couldn't. He felt like he was dying as he began to hyperventilate. Then a shadow crossed his face and he looked up at the man who had kidnapped him.

"Look familiar, Deeks?" Zack Abbott said smiling down on him. "My brother told me what he did to you, so I thought this would be the perfect place to bring you. I'm gonna finish what my brother started and watch you die out here in the desert. When your friends try and save you, I'll kill them one by one right in front of you. Mike would have enjoyed that." Then he walked off to set up his trap, and Marty Deeks vomited into the sand.

...

Eric and Nell began to go over all the surveillance footage from Camp Pendleton. The team needed to know how many men were involved. They had footage of a van leaving one of the back gates and it showed two men, one of who was Zack Abbott.

"G, we can't assume there are only two of them. He could have more men out there in the desert with him," Sam said as they checked the footage on the computers they had with them as they drove towards Deeks' location.

"Eric, we need to see exactly where Deeks is, can you use the satellite imagery to see anything?" Callen asked the tech, knowing he was using everything he could think of to find Deeks.

"What if they already killed him," Kensi said weakly from the back seat, fear pulsing through her.

"Kensi, stop," Sam said, turning towards her. "We thought he was dead once before, and he survived, so remember that. We're going to get him back, Kens, and were going to kill the bastards who did this. It's our turn to save him."

...

Deeks began to feel the effects as the sun rose higher in the sky. He knew his temperature was rising, but there was nothing he could do. He thought about Kensi, Sam and Callen, and he knew they were coming. He knew they were willing to put their lives at risk for him. He wouldn't leave them to die yesterday, and they wouldn't leave him here to die today. They were not just his partners, they were his friends and the closest thing to a family he had. If he survived the desert for a second time, he knew he could never leave them, but he didn't think he could live with himself if he had to watch them shot down trying to save him. So, he tried to stand, and began to fight to free himself once again, as the sun continued to rise higher in the sky.

...

Hetty began to call in favors from her friends in the CIA. She wanted access to a drone that could hover over the location they had been given and feed them video surveillance of the ground. She got what she asked for and informed Callen of the exact time it would be online. She would teach this bastard not to fool with her or her agents.

...

"Kensi, you in position?" Callen asked as he settled himself under the rocky outcrop some distance away, but in front of where Deeks was staked out. "Ready," she replied.

Sam was a hundred yards behind Deeks, and they all could see him as he struggled to free himself. Finally exhausted from his failed efforts, he collapsed. Angry at having to watch him suffer, Sam asked Eric when the drone was going to be in position. "Two minutes, Sam."

"You're our eyes, Eric," Callen told him, "Give us locations on the shooters as soon as you have them."

"Drone coming online now," Eric said sharply, and the team tensed as they waited for their first target.

"Guy's, there are four of them," Eric reported.

Kensi got the first location and spotted the shooter and took him out. Almost at the same time, Callen spotted the second shooter, fired and saw him fall. While they were firing, Sam went for Deeks, but he was hit and went down.

"Sam, status," Callen yelled, but he got no response.

Kensi fired on the third shooter, but wasn't sure if she got him. Then they saw someone running for Deeks, in full body armor. Both agents fired but he made it to Deeks and stood behind him, grabbed a handful of his hair and pulled him to his knees. He put a gun to his head and stood there smiling.

"I'm Zack Abbott, and unless you step out and drop your weapons, I'm going shoot him one body part at a time," Abbott yelled, "You ready to watch that happen?"

Callen and Kensi stepped out into the open and dropped their weapons. Callen was shaking with rage. Kensi had tears in her eyes as she saw Deeks look at her with fear in his eyes. Abbott took aim at Callen, but before he could fire, Deeks slammed his body into Abbott knocking his aim off line. Kensi hit the ground trying to reach her gun, while Callen charged. Abbott swung around and hit Deeks across the face with his pistol, knocking him out. As he turned to fire at Callen, someone fired, hitting Abbott in the left eye and he fell dead in front of Deeks.

Callen stopped and turned to see who had fired the shot. He saw Sam lying prone with his gun still in position. He had passed out, but not before killing Abbott and ending one of the worst ops any of them could remember.

"Eric send medics, Sam's down and so is Deeks." then he ran to Sam's side. A bullet had entered his shoulder just missing the Kevlar vest, but he was alive and Callen let his breath out with relief.

"G," he heard Sam whisper "is Deeks OK?"

"I don't know," Callen said looking over as Kensi cut him free.

"Help me up, G," Sam said as he struggled to get on his feet. Callen supported Sam as they made their way to where Kensi was holding Deeks in her arms.

"Kensi, how is he," Sam asked, as they got close.

"I'm good," Deeks said weakly, and he had a crooked smile on his bloodied face, "But you look awful."

"Yeah, I've been better," Sam laughed.

"You still going to resign?" Callen asked.

"No, but only if you promise me something," Deeks said.

"What?" Kensi asked.

"Promise me that I'll never have to set foot in the desert again." Deeks answered.

"I think we can get Hetty to agree to that," Callen said as the sound of incoming choppers filled the air.


End file.
